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Comedian Quotes
My father was a very funny man, and one of my strongest recollections is hearing him laugh. He didn't like people who had no sense of humour.
~ Mike Myers
Father
Funny
Had
He
Hearing
Him
Humour
Laugh
Like
Man
No Sense
People
Sense
Strongest
Very
Who
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My father was always a straight-up funny guy. He was silly. He was my inspiration.
~ Mike Myers
Always
Father
Funny
Funny Guy
Guy
He
Inspiration
Silly
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My parents taught me to do whatever makes you happy - follow your bliss. That's why I don't make a lot of movies. I'm very meat and potatoes when it comes to work, putting in eight hours each day. I only do what I love.
~ Mike Myers
Bliss
Day
Each
Each Day
Eight
Follow
Happy
Hours
I Love
Lot
Love
Make
Makes
Me
Meat
Movies
Only
Parents
Potatoes
Putting
Taught
Very
Whatever
Why
Work
You
Your
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On my death bed, I'm not going to say, 'God I wish I did more movies.' I'm perfectly happy I was present for the ones I did.
~ Mike Myers
Bed
Death
Did
God
Going
Happy
I Wish
More
Movies
Perfectly
Present
Say
Wish
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Once I turned 35, I got the bonus of some wisdom and began to accept life on its own terms.
~ Mike Myers
Accept
Began
Bonus
Got
Life
Once
Own
Some
Terms
Turned
Wisdom
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The interesting thing about life is, there is what you think is going to happen, and what actually happens.
~ Mike Myers
About
Actually
Going
Happen
Happens
Interesting
Interesting Thing
Life
Thing
Think
You
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There's a joy in having the molecule of an idea, then testing it in front of audiences at secret shows that people only know about the night before.
~ Mike Myers
About
Audiences
Before
Front
Having
Idea
Joy
Know
Night
Only
People
Secret
Shows
Testing
Then
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When I graduated from high school, I got accepted to York University, Fine Arts film program.
~ Mike Myers
Accepted
Arts
Film
Fine
Fine Arts
Got
Graduated
High
High School
Program
School
University
York
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With fame there is a crosswire between intensity and intimacy. You have decoy intimacy, but you are also very much alone.
~ Mike Myers
Alone
Also
Between
Fame
Intensity
Intimacy
Much
Very
You
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A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
~ Milton Berle
Always
Forgives
Good
Good Wife
Her
Husband
She
Wife
Wrong
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I have a file of four million jokes... I have them cross-indexed. Whatever subject you want, I have a joke on it.
~ Milton Berle
File
Four
Joke
Jokes
Million
Subject
Them
Want
Whatever
You
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I received a lot of complaints from parents who wrote and told me that their kids wouldn't go to sleep until our show was over. So I went on the air and told all the children watching to 'listen to their Uncle Miltie and go to bed right after the show.'
~ Milton Berle
After
Air
Bed
Children
Complaints
Go
Kids
Listen
Lot
Me
Our
Over
Parents
Received
Right
Show
Sleep
Uncle
Until
Watching
Who
Wrote
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It's amazing how fast later comes when you buy now.
~ Milton Berle
Amazing
Buy
Fast
How
Later
Now
You
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Like every comedian, if I heard a joke that I thought would work, I used it.
~ Milton Berle
Comedian
Every
Heard
Joke
Like
Thought
Used
Work
Would
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Money can't buy you happiness, but it helps you look for it in a lot more places.
~ Milton Berle
Buy
Happiness
Helps
Look
Lot
Money
More
Places
You
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My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.
~ Milton Berle
Add
Could
Doctor
Feel
He
I Feel
I Think
Jogging
Life
Me
My Life
Older
Right
Ten
Ten Years
Think
Years
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Now a 'funnyman' can get a laugh before opening his mouth - looking funny. Lou Costello was one of your great funnymen. Harry Langdon, Larry Semon; they were all funnymen - they looked funny. W.C. Fields was never a comedian. Slim Summerville was a comedian, yet looked funny. Now if you have both attributes, you are in good shape.
~ Milton Berle
Attributes
Before
Both
Comedian
Fields
Funny
Get
Good
Good Shape
Great
Harry
His
Larry
Laugh
Looked
Looking
Mouth
Never
Now
Opening
Shape
Slim
Were
You
Your
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People say I owe a lot to television. The fact is I was a star long before television. What TV made me is unemployed.
~ Milton Berle
Before
Fact
Long
Lot
Made
Me
Owe
People
People Say
Say
Star
Television
TV
Unemployed
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There's a difference between being a comic and a comedian. A comic is a guy who says funny things, and a comedian is a guy who says things funny, and he has a style and point of view that will last much longer.
~ Milton Berle
Being
Between
Comedian
Comic
Difference
Funny
Funny Things
Guy
He
Last
Longer
Much
Point
Says
Style
Things
View
Who
Will
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They've finally comes up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.
~ Milton Berle
Another
Computer
Finally
Makes
Mistake
Office
Perfect
Up
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