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Mark Twain Quotes
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
~ Mark Twain
Distort
Facts
First
Get
Please
Them
Then
You
Your
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Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
~ Mark Twain
Because
Done
Easiest
Easiest Thing
Giving
Giving Up
Know
Smoking
Thing
Thousands
Times
Up
World
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Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
~ Mark Twain
Climate
Company
Go
Heaven
Hell
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God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
~ Mark Twain
Board
God
He
Idiot
Made
Practice
School
School Board
Then
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Golf is a good walk spoiled.
~ Mark Twain
Golf
Good
Spoiled
Walk
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Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.
~ Mark Twain
Breeding
Concealing
Consists
Good
Good Breeding
How
How Much
Little
Much
Other
Ourselves
Person
Think
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Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
~ Mark Twain
Books
Conscience
Friends
Good
Good Friends
Ideal
Life
Sleepy
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Grief can take care if itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.
~ Mark Twain
Care
Divide
Full
Get
Grief
Itself
Joy
Must
Somebody
Take
Take Care
Value
You
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He is now rising from affluence to poverty.
~ Mark Twain
Affluence
He
Now
Poverty
Rising
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Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
~ Mark Twain
Best
Honesty
Honesty Is
Money
Policy
The Best Policy
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Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
~ Mark Twain
Blessing
Greatest
Greatest Blessing
Humor
Mankind
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Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever.
~ Mark Twain
Both
Forever
Humor
Live
Must
Preach
Teach
Would
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I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
~ Mark Twain
Am
Great
Happened
I Am
Known
Man
Many
Most
Never
Old
Old Man
Them
Troubles
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I can live for two months on a good compliment.
~ Mark Twain
Compliment
Good
I Can
Live
Months
Two
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I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
~ Mark Twain
Approved
Attend
Funeral
Letter
Nice
Saying
Sent
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I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.
~ Mark Twain
Damn
Give
Man
One-Way
Only
Spell
Way
Word
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I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places.
~ Mark Twain
About
Both
Commit
Friends
Heaven
Hell
Like
Myself
Places
See
You
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I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; I always feel that they have not said enough.
~ Mark Twain
Always
Been
Embarrass
Enough
Feel
Many
Me
Said
Times
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I have made it a rule never to smoke more that one cigar at a time.
~ Mark Twain
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I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
~ Mark Twain
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